Blood Drive

Twister Metal cack?

Now that sweary-shouty developer man David Jaffe is done with his God of War trilogy, he's bizarrely decided to refocus his attentions on the game that made him (semi) famous in the first place - the carnage-crammed arena racer Twisted Metal.

A combination of Jaffe being hot for PS3 and Sony owning the license means 360 owners will never see Sweet Tooth on their consoles, so instead they're lumped with this: an Honest Dave knock-off with an engine packed full of sawdust, and dead bodies in the boot.

Amazingly, we're not really that bothered. That's because Blood Drive is okay. Well, that's 'okay' in a 'don't touch it at £20 but maybe mull it over for a fiver' fashion.

The concept is age-old: choose from a selection of clichéd nutters (ripped pimp daddy, psycho ambulance driver, sexy Russian lady) and rev about a range of post-apocalyptic arenas (ruined Vegas, smashed-up car park, borked airport) either mullering zombies, immolating fellow drivers, or both.

That forms the majority of your race objectives, except for a near-broken checkpoint slog-o-thon, a King of the Hill variant and a fun-but-nails joyride where the aim is to grab a Golden Skull and rack up as much time with it on your roof as you can.

Blood Drive is a funny old game. It somehow manages to make its core ideas - which should surely be a lot of laughs - a lot of old bum gravy. Your arsenal sounds sadistic, but packs less of a punch than a sneeze.

The zombies are so scarce they're harder to hit than a cute little girl, and when you do connect there's little sense of impact. Your rivals are scabby basts who wait for you to soften up the opposition before grabbing the glory from under your bloodied nose. The vehicle handling is insipid. There are only six arenas.

And yet... somehow, it all conspires to be rather jolly. The key to what charm Blood Drive has is its inability to take itself too seriously, with sarky, foul-mouthed commentary and a frantic, frenetic edge to races (faff about and you'll plunge down the leaderboard).

Cheap, cheerful and insanely competitive - just don't expect much. Oh, and if you don't give a toss about the undead, you'd probably be better off with 2007's Flatout: Ultimate Carnage, which has a succession of much better bolted-on modes like this.

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The verdict

Utterly rubbish, but bizarrely addictive - unless you've paid over a fiver for it, of course

  • Bloodily frenetic
  • Crap handling/weapons
  • Dull zombies
Xbox 360