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5 games overscored by reviewers

The worst of the best...

For every genuinely brilliant game there are about fifty rubbish ones.

Every once in a while a troublesome rogue sneaks through the net; a game that gets a great score but it in actual fact a flaming turd that you've been tricked into stepping in. Kind of like that scene in Billy Madison where Adam Sandler puts a flaming brown bag of poop on an old man's doorstep and rings the bell.

It's not uncommon for gamers to buy a game after seeing critics rave about it, only to finally play it and think "what was all the fuss about?" Most of that can be chalked up to difference of opinions, after all reviews are just one person's opinion. But occasionally there's the odd game that is undoubtedly as cancerous as...err, cancer that somehow manages to get a decent or even above average score.

Here is our list of games that we think might not be entirely deserving of the scores they were awarded.

TUROK 2

Despite what you heard about it, Turok 2 wasn't good.

Issue 21 of Official N64 Magazine reviewed Turok 2: Seeds of Evil and awarded it 95%. In the review, they described Turok 2 as "one of the best things to happen to the N64 since its launch."

"Turok 2 is, without a doubt, the best looking console game you'll ever see," said the dirty liars. Our point of contention with this isn't necessarily that the reviewer somehow mistook the muddy colors, blurry textures and the blanket of fog used to replace actual environments for work of art. It's with the moment of utter madness in which the reviewer predicts it is "the best looking console game we'll EVER see".

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This means that Official N64 Magazine thinks Turok 2 looks better than Uncharted 3, Crysis and Battlefield 3. We also heard that the reviewer said Nathan Drake's mum is a promiscuous hussy. We may have just made that bit up - in for a penny in for a pound, right?

The review goes on to boast that Turok 2's sampled speech adds up to a whopping total of eight whole minutes. "We kid you not," the review shouts excitedly. We're wondering if dinosaur banter contributed to any of that astounding eight minutes of chit chat.

Then, the review just gets downright offensive by placing it on equal ground with Rare's GoldenEye: "The question everyone will be asking is, is it better than GoldenEye? Well, yes...and no". Get to explaining philistines...

"Because GoldenEye is still an awesome game in its own right and, really and truthfully, such a different game to this." What a copout.

Although it is fun to read this review nowadays and poke fun at it, it was written in 1998 so criticising it retrospectively is a tad unfair, especially given the wondrous gaming age we live in today.

"Turok 2 is the new Doom." *Snigger*

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