"Welcome to the dungeon'we've got no fun and games'we've got nothing you want and dont care about your names'we are the people that sell you junk'sh*t that you dont need'if you got the money honey we've got tons of cheese" - Mar27w
Fell apart a bit at the end there, but we respect your dedication to seeing it through.
"Apparently they were gonna bring out a Man Yoo one but the ball wouldn't go further than halfway up the table." - Paul Skinback
Come on, what's the Mata with you.
"Take That outsold Busted. Busted outsold 1Direction. Sales are not a mark of quality. Neither is my knowledge of music." - Tailisjoy
Quite. We're pretty sure Busted never outsold anyone.
"s**t, I think I just agreed with Peter Molyneux." - arron114
Happens to the best of us, mate.
"now imagine tobacco companies thinking this way "we are doing harm, lets stop selling this stuff"" - kovin
That's just crazy talk. Speak sense.
"i wonder if it'll require an always online connection or if he's dealt with it and decided that would be a stupid f**king thing to do." - billysastard
Will you never let the man LIVE?!
"You might say King is holding Albert Ransom..." - kyleforrester87
Just to clarify, the indie chap in question is indeed named Albert Ransom.
"The Vita is a lovely machine, I got mine on a whim about 4 months ago and love it. Remote play is extremely cool and lets me play Black Flag on the toilet." - apalmer28
"Yarrr! Send 'em to Davey Jones' locker!" - BadgerOfDoom
PUNS OF THE WEEK
"Whatever they're working on, hopefully it'll have a wad of gore
I'll get my coat..." - Luke Beaman
It's alright, we've already got it for you.
"I thought this game was a bit of a let down but I'm optimistic that it could be improved with updates. That said it's quite addictive and sometimes I start feeling like a vegetable after awhile.
Maybe I should make a guide with 15 steps for those who might be finding it difficult and then you can all prove yourself to me.
Too much? All I need is my coat and I'll be off once I've found out how to disappear completely, perhaps I'll be lucky and learn it fairly quickly.
Note: I've not actually played the game yet, I'm downloading it now and I just wanted to make some puns whilst waiting." - The_Mighty_Steve
Never have we wanted a download to finish so quickly.
"Getting a broner just thinking about this game..." - power rack
"That gameplay video totally bro'd me away!" - MrPirtniw
"Sounds like the UK may indeed be seeing some heavy brofall..." - power rack
"Bro me! This looks fun..." - immy46
All of you are banned from the universe.
MOANERS OF THE WEEK
""There's no doubt that Titanfall is this year's most eagerly-anticipated release" my arse. What planet is this muppet living on to make that kind of witless comment? Destiny is a more anticipated release this year. Hell, it's one of the most anticipated releases of all time & this clown wants to call a multiplayer only M$/PC exclusive (and thus a limited audience release) the most eagerly awaited game of the year? Time to find a new job mate, with a talent for spouting BS like that you'd make a consummate politician (or a lawyer) but someone with enough knowledge to be a game journalist you are most definitely not." - CrouchingWeasel
Video games: serious business.
"Why do you want the gameplay to 'change much' FFS? If you want different gameplay, play a different game! I for one am totally sick of franchises completely changing direction in its gameplay, for absolutely NO reason. Resident Evil 5 and 6 spring to mind, Dead Space 2 and 3 are more examples. STOP GIVING SEQUELS s**t SCORES/PREVIEWS FOR BEING MORE OF THE SAME. That's what sequels are, if you don't want more of the same, BUY A DIFFERENT GAME." - Peter Corr
We appreciate with the sentiment, we just aren't keen on the delivery. A bit like a postman jamming flowers through a letterbox.
"This is worse than Xbox Live. It is like, a twenty year old game. I ain't paying forty quid a year, admittedly, for this service. But I have never fought in the war either but I constantly rail against that.
Mr Whiney" - Tailisjoy
You weren't there, man!
"OH, FOR F**KS SAKE!!!
Why does this keep happening!? They hold stuff back on Wii U, then people go and buy it on other consoles rather than spend 4 months avoiding spoilers, THEN when it finally comes out and only 200 people buy it, they go "oh, not enough people bought it on Wii U, so we're not going to patch it or release DLC.", meaning those poor customers get for there patience... Some crowbarred-in touch screen minigames, a map on the gamepad & bugs out the wazoo." - Tomuki
We had bugs out the wazoo once. The doctors couldn't look us in the eye.