5-Jul-2004 It's A funny old game. Well, actually, Chaos League is a funny old game. Perhaps not in the sense that it'll have you rolling about cackling like a loon, but it is mildly amusing.
Take for instance the typically mundane kick-off - not usually the most exciting part of a team sports event by any stretch of the imagination (unless some bushy earth mother sneaks onto the pitch in her birthday suit), but here the ball begins in the centre of the pitch strapped to a pig, which must be bundled to the ground and mercilessly slaughtered in order for play to begin. And no, there is no vegetarian option - this is a French game.
Much hilarity ensues during the match too, as alongside the regular all-American girl cheerleaders are mercenary female fans that can only be described as trolls. Green of skin, wide of hip and with tits like fried eggs, they happily wave severed heads in the air whenever anyone scores a touchdown.
As you can guess then, Chaos League is rather distinct from sports games we've had to sit through in the past. American football is of course the inspiration, but NFL this most certainly isn't, for while the aim of the game is to force an egg-shaped ball into the opponent's end zone, its rules and ways are considerably less formal.
Ent To Ent Stuff Aside from the team sheet, which reads like a What's What of Middle-earth, the main difference between Chaos League and every other sports game is that violence and foul play isn't only encouraged, it's absolutely essential. Weapons aren't allowed on the pitch and kicking an opponent who's already down is considered bad form, but these are the only rules you have to adhere to during a typical ten-minute game.
With ten races to choose from prior to kick-off, clearly not all are perfectly suited to brawling - the Elves and Goblins being the obvious weaklings. However, what the rat-faced greenskins lack in brute force they make up for in agility, while the Elves can certainly string a few passes together.
Whichever race you may have a preference for, all are able to field the basic array of player positions, of which there are five; the playmaking quarterback, the brawling linemen, defence-minded linebackers, swift receivers and the more versatile running backs. To beef up the team, each race is also able to recruit a number of monsters selective to their race. The Undead prefer Mummies while the tree-hugging Elves can rely on friendly Ents to help them in battle. Slow in getting about but able to dish out inordinate amounts of punishment, these beasts are the centrepiece of any team and the rules of the game being practically non-existent, you can field as many of each player type your purse will allow - up to the maximum outfield team size of nine, of course.
A Good Spell Of Possession Winning doesn't always come from strength and brute force, however. Certain races and player positions have access to spells that can be cast during the game - some can temporarily blind opposition players, while others give you the ability to summon creatures to help bolster your defence for a brief time. If you choose to play the Championship game, each player gains experience and can then spend points on even greater spells and abilities. This increases the potential to wreak havoc on the opposition.
However, the players aren't the only ones able to affect a match. Please the crowd with your scoring or mauling prowess and you may be given access to more spells that enable you to create a fog of war across the pitch, or even plant mines for the ultimate defensive strategy. Conversely, if you stand around in possession for too long, the crowd pelts your players with rotten vegetables - and if there's an impatient wizard in the stands, he could well unleash something far more lethal too. With fans like these, who need enemies?
Jerkins For Goalposts As well as looking more than a little distinct from other sports titles, Chaos League plays entirely differently as well. Rather than controlling the player nearest the ball as you might expect, all the players are controlled similarly to the units in a real-time strategy game. Initially the mouse-clicking doesn't feel quite as intuitive as when playing a typical football game like Pro Evolution Soccer, but when you consider how much off-the-ball play is made, as well as the vast array of abilities and spells that have to be called into play, an RTS interface makes a lot of sense. The downside is that the game is tricky to get to grips with and the interface is far from simple, but you can at least be sure that very few games will play out identically to the last, so varied are the teams and their abilities.
With the added benefit of a timed turn-based mode, exhibition matches, a full set of four leagues to play through with a decent spread of management options, plus some intriguing multiplayer options where you can have three people in control of each team, Chaos League certainly has plenty of features to look forward to. The only aspect of the game that could do with some last-minute work is the presentation, with text that is hard to make out and graphics that are far from spectacular. But then perhaps we've been influenced for far too long by the flashy dominance of innumerable EA Sports titles. Certainly, Chaos League lacks the graphical polish we might otherwise expect, but in terms of originality it's probably the most interesting sporting title we've seen for years. And if you've an unhealthy sexual appetite for slutty trolls or a carnivorous lust for pre-match bacon, all the better.
In spite of the overwhelming variety of players available, the Championship side of the game could do with some extra features. For instance, once you pick a race to manage and control, you are limited to a specific type of player you can field - an unfortunate side effect of which is that you cannot buy players from other teams. In fact there are no transfer options at all, so if you are in control of a goblin team and you like the look of your rival's dwarf star player, you can't recruit him to your side no matter how big your finances. Sadly, whilst we think a full transfer market would be an excellent addition to Chaos League, the developers aren't keen to work on all the added permutations that might unbalance the game at such a late stage in the development process.
You can spend experience points on added abilities.
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