13-Aug-2001 Charlie Brooker once owned a trenchcoat. Well, it smelt like a trench, anyway. A Frenchman's trench that hadn't been wiped since 1978. Oddly enough, each time he wore it, people would run away screaming. Just like in Syndicate Wars...
This is good. this is very very good. No. Wait a minute. It's better than that. This is brilliant. This game is brilliant. Aside from Quake, I haven't enjoyed a game this much in ages. This is Syndicate Wars. It's one of the best excuses for taking the phone off the hook and staying indoors for a week that I've ever come across. In terms of concept, content and execution, it's one of the best games I've ever played on any system. Ever. I'm in gamegeek heaven.
What makes it so good? Almost everything. I don't know quite where to start, so I reckon one of the best things to do is start with one of the most important aspects - yes, you've guessed it, the gameplay.
The gameplay
Syndicate Wars will appeal to anyone who liked either Doom or Command & Conquer (well, that narrows it down a bit, eh?). It's got the cathartic violence of the former, and the strategic tension of the latter. Those of you familiar with the first Syndicate only need to know this: Syndicate Wars is even better. Those of you who haven't played the original are in for a major treat.
Here's the deal: You've got this gang of cyborgs, see. Four of 'em (occasionally less) who can be controlled as a group, or individually. They can have their moods altered with special drugs (depending on how trigger-happy you want them to be). The aim is to complete a series of missions, each set in a different city. These start off being fairly simple - 'kill a couple of bad guys' affairs - but rapidly turn into nightmarishly difficult assignments. Some require extensive planning. One mission, for instance, has you masterminding the hijack of a convoy of armoured bullion trucks. Another involves kid-napping a pair of high-powered business executives who are under police guard. All of them end with shitloads of corpses littering the pavement, like so many discarded socks across a teenager's bedroom carpet. Cops, enemy agents, innocent bystanders - everybody dies. Make no mistake - this is ultraviolence, shoved right in your face. The vicarious thrills just never stop coming. It's as addictive as crack cocaine and The Simpsons put together.
In between the action sequences you'll also need to keep an eye on your finances, and most important of all, your Research and Develop-ment team. Investigating new tools of destruction and cybernetic upgrades for your soldiers is utterly essential (and without it, you'll never get your hands on the really spectacular weapons).
Hot sound and vision
In hi-res mode, (which requires a decent Pentium to move efficiently) Syndicate Wars looks glorious. It is chunkier than the original - which takes a bit of getting used to - but before long you end up falling hopelessly in love with it. We're talking Blade Runner territory here - lots of gloomy towers, glaring neon, and fully animated video screens (which have fmv adverts for cult sci-fi comic 2000AD and Manga products on them). The brilliant lighting effects aren't just pretty, they actually add to the game (blow up all the lampposts, and you'll find yourself suddenly plunged into darkness). One major difference between this and the original is that the city is represented in 'proper' 3d - you can spin it around and tilt up and down to get a really good peek at the carnage.
And Syndicate Wars' sound is utterly top of the pops, too. Aside from the menacing soundtrack (a cunning blend of cd audio and midi synthesis), there are rumbling explosions, horrendous blood-curdling screams, and ominous tannoys telling the hapless citizens to 'keep moving'. Bloody fantastic.
As you can imagine, add all of these elements together and you've got possibly the most pervasively threatening atmosphere you've ever experienced. Unless you've ever walked down Kilburn High Road at chucking out time, that is (which isn't recommended, by the way).
Ooh, you are awful..
Part of the joy of Syndicate Wars is the way it positively encourages you to act in a reprehensible manner. Aside from the thrill you get from committing purposeless acts of random savagery (which usually involves running after a screaming crowd of pedestrians with a flamethrower), here are just two of the ways in which acting like a devious bastard can actually aid your cause...
1) Exploiting the emergency services
You'll often find yourself in need of a set of wheels in the game. Sometimes they're just parked at the side of the road for you to casually help yourself to (ie steal), but occasionally you'll need to be a little more cunning. Here's one particularly good method: Stand on a street corner for a couple of minutes, shooting as many pedestrians as you can. Once you've bagged a load of them, hide round the corner. Now wait a few minutes. If you're in luck, an ambulance will arrive. As soon as the do-gooding medic steps out onto the pavement, shoot him right in the face. Et voila - one spanking new ambulance for you to speed around in. Cool, huh?
(Above) Casualty was never like this.
2) The 'Groupie Shield'
Switch on the 'Persuadertron' (or equivalent), and start rounding up a few easily-brainwashed civvies. Once you've got a large crowd of them milling around you like mindless sheep, head for the nearest bunch of gun-toting bad guys. Not only will your gang of adoring followers join in the fighting with any discarded guns they come across, they also make a handy human shield - especially useful when someone else is sniping at you from afar.
There goes the neighbourhood
Buildings, eh? What a huge pain in the arse. I mean, they're just no good for anything. You can't walk anywhere these days without a bloody building getting in your way. They clutter up the pave-ment and they ruin your view of the sky. They're ugly and they're boxy and they shouldn't be allowed. Even Prince Charles thinks so (sort of).
In this respect, Syndicate Wars should warm the cockles of the Royal heart nicely. The endless destruction within the game isn't limited to mere human-on-human barbarism - structures get it in the neck as well. Use a sufficiently meaty explosive and you're treated to the sight of entire skyscrapers crumpling down around you. At times the action gets so insanely apocalyptic you'll suddenly wonder where the skyline went as entire districts are destroyed.
If the end of the world looks half as good as this, I want it on laserdisc.
A couple of gripes
Those of you who are paying attention will have noticed that I'm enjoying this game. Yet despite all this unalloyed praise, I do have a couple of tiny gripes. They won't seriously spoil your enjoy-ment, but they are a tad irritating...
1) Zooming in and out
Initially, this really wound me up. Despite the inclusion of a 'zoom in and out' function, Syndicate Wars doesn't give you much control over the zoom factor. Your field of vision is dictated by the range of the weapon you choose: use an Uzi, for instance, and it zooms in close. Pick a long-range rifle and it zooms out again. Most of the time, you don't really notice, but occasionally it's bloody annoying - you can't see what's around the corner, and it doesn't look as nice either. Often I found myself temporarily choosing a long-range weapon just so I could see more of my surroundings. The two-level preview demo Bullfrog sent us a few months ago had a far greater 'zoomed out' look to it - was the change really necessary?
2) The AI 'lapses'
Although the ai is far superior to that in the original Syndicate, it does have problems now and again, especially when you move the entire group of agents. Nothing's more irritating than seeing three of your team members strolling effortlessly to their target location, while one inexplicably gets 'stuck' behind a fence somewhere along the route. Like, duuuuhhh.
Multiple maniacs
Aside from being a brilliant one-player game, Syndicate Wars also has more multi-player options than you can shake a stick at. For starters, you can play with four players on one machine (each controlling an agent via the keyboard or joypad). Better yet, if you have access to a network or modem, you can link up with seven other psychopaths and run riot through the streets. Multi-player games are really quite flexible - not only are you free to play as EuroCorp, The Church or the Unguided, you can also decide what level of firepower will be available - from lo-tech (Uzi 9mm) to 'end-of-the-world' materials (nuclear grenades). As you can probably imagine, it all gets extremely noisy. It's also a bloody good laugh.
The conclusion
So, then. We've come to the end of the review. It's late. I want to stop typing. Not just because my wrists ache more than they did the week I first discovered how to 'manipulate' myself (last April, I think it was), but because I want to have another go on the game before I go to bed. According to my watch, it's quarter to four in the morning. I have to be up early tomorrow. If I start playing,
I might have to forget about sleeping altogether and try to make it through tomorrow with a never-ending stream of strong black coffee instead. And that's sad. That's tragically sad. But I don't care, because I'm gripped. I'm quite happy to cancel weekends away and to neglect my social life (well, it wasn't up to much anyway) - Syndicate Wars has grabbed me by my entrails and refuses to let go...
Syndicate Wars really does have it all. The more you play it, the better it gets. There's an unbelievable amount of detail packed in there. And an equally unbel-ievable amount of good, honest fun to be soaked up, too. All of you rejoice. Kill, maim, and rejoice. Z
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